The Beauty and the Beast

This post covers my time in Amsterdam and The Hague. 

Amsterdam

Stop Two on my trip was Amsterdam: the city with a reputation for friendliness, liberalism, and hedonism. While I knew all about the Coffee Shops where marijuana is available for customers’ enjoyment, and a red-light district famous the world over, I wanted to find what else was here that makes Amsterdam special.

I stayed at a really nice hostel called CocoMama, which was a converted brothel. The staff were super-friendly and the location was really nice. Out of the city centre but in an ideal spot for doing a circuit walk through all the cool districts that make up the city. The one downer with that hostel: really small rooms, and even smaller bathrooms. I read a review where someone commented they had to sit on the toilet sideways. I’m not at all surprised.

I did a big walk right round the city, through the museum and Jewish districts, the “9 Streets” district which had a lot of alternative shops, the Central city then out along the harbour a wee way to find a windmill.  I whipped through the Albert Cuyps street market for breakfast: satay chicken skewers, a blueberry smoothie and sausage roll (unhealthy I know) before heading to the Van Gogh museum, which had some nice pieces, but the crowds just kept pouring in making it hard to appreciate what I was looking at. What made it worse were these big tour groups that just moved like a school of sardines: all together now, and God forbid you stray 4 feet from your companions… (insert image of me shaking my fist angrily).

I was going to go to Anne Frank’s House but the crowds for that were huge as well. The line went down the street and around the corner. An Australian guy I met at the Hostel said he went past at 8.30am and there were about 60 people waiting for it to open. So I skipped that. If it hadn’t been blowing a gale, cold as a frog’s tit, and raining, I may have deigned to wait in line for 30-45 minutes to get in.

Walking through the central city I saw the abundant Coffee Shops with bongs on all the tables. I may have been tempted to pop into one but the tourists going in were very much the lower rungs of society, which was quite off-putting (so I’m a bit of a snob, so sue me, though bear in mind you’ll lose). I also find weed smoke rather sweet and sickly. There were also lots of shops selling various strains of weed and seeds as well. I read that the Dutch are quite adept at mixing varieties to get a range of effects for the user. I also skirted the red light district. I was warned it was dodgy security-wise, but the abundant “Live Sex Show” signs were enough of an introduction. At this point, you are probably saying: Man, what a PRUDE! My reply, read the first paragraph again.

I eventually found my windmill, which was nice. You can’t go to the Netherlands and not get a windmill photo!!!

The things I loved about Amsterdam were the beautiful canals, many lined with houseboats and the amazing old architecture. Some of the buildings were literally one room wide, and a few were leaning on each other for support. It was everything I wanted Europe to be in that respect. There were lots of bikes everywhere as well including my fave, the cargo bike. I so wish you could get those in NZ.

Alas, my time here was short and I had to get to stop number three: The Hague, a 10 Euro, 50-minute train ride away.

The Hague

A few words: dull, dull, and even duller still. Whereas Amsterdam is the capital of The Netherlands, The Hague is the seat of Government. It is a city devoid of life and culture. Let’s face it; I’m sitting here in my hotel room writing this, as there is nothing better to do.

Mardurodam miniature

OK, not totally devoid of culture. They do have this one museum called Mauritshuis with a bunch of Dutch Masters like Vermeer and Rembrandt including Vermeer’s Girl With a Pearl Earring. And the Queen lives here. Oh, and there is Mardurodam which has a bunch of famous Dutch towns and famous buildings done at 1:25 scale. I did enjoy that one.

Finally, there is Scheveningnen, a sea-side village (more a suburb) with a really tacky, over-developed beach. I did learn one interesting thing. They are building a dyke along this beach as it is the weak point in the system of barriers against the sea that threatens to swamp most of Holland. Given that it is the North Sea which is pretty rough on a good day, I can see why.

Tomorrow I depart for Antwerp. I can safely say that I will likely never return to The Hague for leisure purposes.